Where Did My Life Go?

I turned 60 last December. How could that be? Wasn’t I still in my 30’s? When I was in my 20’s I had my life all planned out. I was going to marry a tall, dark and handsome godly man who loved me deeply. We would buy a house with a white picket fence in a suburban neighborhood. We wouldn’t have money troubles or disagreements over where to spend Christmas. We would have 1 or 2 children who would be delightful and well behaved. We would homeschool and life would be grand.

Photo by Lisa Fotios on Pexels.com

I bet you can guess how that transpired. I did get the godly tall, dark and handsome man but the rest, not so much. The picket fence in the suburbs never came. We had money problems, I had challenges with the inlaws and i was at a loss on how to do life.

We encountered fertility issues for several years and when our only son wasn’t hitting his first year milestones, we found out he was delayed in many areas. Later a doctor diagnosed him with Angelman’s Syndrome. This wasn’t suppose to be happening. God had gotton my life mixed up with someone else!

I had my life all planned out, but somehow God had gotton my life mixed up with someone else!

I talked with an older, godly woman at church. When she asked me why i didn’t think God should allow trials in my life, i was offended. I walked out of that meeting very discouraged. Wasn’t God suppose to give me a happy life as i went to church and gave my ten percent? I was doing my part, why wasn’t He doing His?

That was the year i realized i had grown up with a faulty faith, my walk with Jesus wasn’t going to be all roses and sunshine like i had heard preached in church. Jesus tells us in the gospels that here on earth we will have troubles, but He reassures us that He has overcome the world. Here is my story …


10 thoughts on “Where Did My Life Go?

  1. Your story reminds me of the subtitle of my book “BARRIERS” – “So, if prayers are so powerful, how come mine don’t get answered?”
    I’mve had those times, too, when I thought God didn’t get the memo. But, as a character in one of my other books said, “They lived happily ever after ” is just another way of saying, “Nothing interesting or exciting happened to them after that.” 😏

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Well written Gail!! I have also struggled with my faith in God allowing troubles in my life! Your story reveals hope and redemption for true believers and seekers alike! Can’t wait to read more!!

    Liked by 1 person

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